02:40:33 yeah
02:41:05 think it's a possibly misogynistic control thing. Just want to hold you down and keep you down and please myself
02:41:26 shut me up
02:41:31 and use me
02:41:56 yeah, stop you...talking back. Or something. Just take what I want from you.
02:42:32 i have a very distinct memory of my face pushed against brick.. a wall maybe.. damp from the rain
02:42:48 and you pressed hard against my back , with your hands wound in my hair
02:43:20 see...I don't understand why, but you make me feel violent. I've had that with some people but not with everyone. I don't understand the chemistry of it.
02:43:59 i love that. it charges me up so much.
02:44:48 makes me want to struggle just to be restrained harder
02:45:22 * thinking *
02:45:41 * feeling *
02:45:54 * wan --
02:46:35 I want to...I suppose my lying on your back thing, the root is, I want to possess you and make you helpless
02:47:23 its hard to analyse this stuff... when you say "you make me feel violent".. that hits me in the pit of my stomach.. in such a good way
02:48:08 yeah...my curiosity is, I don't feel that way about everyone. I was very violent with H (D's ex), but it's not my norm.
02:48:27 well, a few possibilities
02:48:37 its to do with her and me - the fact we want it
02:48:48 or its to do with the context
02:49:40 I think it's partly being intimidated and bewitched at the same time...makes me want to physically and mentally crush you in revenge
02:50:03 yes. its a lot to do with the fact that i argue with you and challenge you and exhaust you
02:50:20 R and i are like that... not always, but often ..and at first, always
02:51:16 yeah, you're a more dominant personality than me. So there's a massive backlash.
02:52:11 It makes it D H Lawrence style sex. 'He could only conceive of the sex act as two people trying to destroy each other' -- Earl Russell.
Purple = Me
Black = Him
3 comments:
Lovely. I think I have a fetish for transcripts of other people's Messenger chats.
Although I think I generally experience the sex act as two people trying to destroy themselves
Do you mean by annihilating their consciousness?
Glad you like the transcript. There's a lot more where that came from!
Yes, I should have explained myself better, I'm interested in states where the body is working without the thinking 'I'. Will do a post about it soon.
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